The Sell By Date
Lately I have been exploring a new question. Do we come with a sell by date? We all have a date coming up and usually have no idea when. Teenagers say “Never!”, and we old people are looking ahead with some anxiety. Is our sell by date preordained or is it random, like much of life.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dukkha
As I age, am I living past that date? Am I like that jug of milk past it’s date but not quite going off? Well, a little off. I slipped on the stairs yesterday and bounced down a few steps. Earlier, I tripped on some sod I dug up and whacked my elbow. Are these portents or am I already sour? Some would say I have been sour for some time.
The death date looms for us all. Most of the time we ignore the end, but events come up to remind us of the inevitability of death. Often it is the death of a loved one. So many go before us. The earth is a graveyard. All things emerge, exist, and go away. Look supernovas up. Our planet will participate in one some day. We Americans are lucky, we probably won’t drown in the Mediterranean trying to escape being killed in our own country. No chlorine gas attacks in Denver. Bad things do happen, but most of us will live to, or maybe even past, that sell by date. But, the end is coming for everyone.
Well, so what? It happens, so why not have as much fun as possible until then? I just wrote a couple of pieces on life. Meaningless or purposeful? For me, the purpose is the end of suffering, or dukka in the ancient language. If suffering is the only end, why not go before that sell by date? So, end suffering. If I am going to get anywhere with ending suffering for all living beings I have to start with myself.
Suffering
I have a sore elbow and hip from my falls yesterday. I feel pain. From the pain, I have a choice. I can just feel the pain, be in touch with it, and get on with things or dwell on the pain, lament having pain, regret the falls, blame the world for my suffering, and be miserable. An alternative to the suffering is to sit in the coffee shop and try to communicate about how I often avoid suffering even when living with pain.
Here I am in this body with a big brain and limbs that mostly work pretty well. The body is fragile, and all kinds of hurts happen, including our mental processes. Pain is inevitable, followed by dying. Suffering is a decision. My skin and bones are a little damaged, but life goes on. If I can avoid suffering because stuff hurts, maybe I can help others do the same thing. Less suffering, a better world.
I remember a couple running a shop. They often refused to talk to customers or each other or replied with anger and sarcasm. Their voices were always hostile with one another and the attitude spilled over to the customers. The atmosphere in the place was toxic. Not surprisingly, the shop is long gone, despite occupying an important niche. The other side is happiness. The person I was working with yesterday always seems to be upbeat and happy. She even laughs at my jokes, which seem to make others suffer. She makes the world a better place.
There it is: the goal is to make it better. End suffering, practice loving kindness, work on equanimity. Find the good. Life is too short and precious to spend it wrapped in discontent and negativity. find love and peace, not hate and discord.
The sell by date is coming. We may go a bit past the date, but then we die.